Today is the first time I have cried tears of joy regarding baby Titus. As I said in the last post, we received news that took us out of the running for becoming Titus's family. Miracle number one is that his birthmother, even though she was not asked, wrote down a second choice family. This couple could still adopt Titus, even though we could not. The social workers were not aware that this couple had a family emergency on Saturday, the day that Titus was born. This family emergency consumed them until Tuesday. Miraculously, Tuesday they were then available to be involved, and just hours after we had our final Titus conversation with our social worker, they learned of him and went to meet him shortly after. Our social worker shared that they would not have been able to be with him in those first few days, and that we stood in the gap during circumstances beyond anyone's control. Without knowing it, we were his foster parents, we were able to love him as our child, hold him close, and whisper prayers. Finding out our role in his life has given us so much peace. We got to know his birthmother in the month before his birth, and we got to greet him when he entered this world with love and comfort. We can see now that this was the plan from the beginning that only God could have ordained. Having these answers is such a blessing, God has so lovingly provided us with the ability to see the bigger picture. How awesome is it that Titus never went a day without a family? God provided for him each step.
That being said, I still feel the pangs of sadness. I miss him and the details of his tiny personality. Moving in and out of the mother position is an emotional job, and I will always consider those three days to be very special. We know God isn't finished with our adoption story. As we told our kids a few days ago, "adoption is still the plan, but sometimes God asks us to help others along the way." We are so thankful that God allowed us to help Titus; we certainly grew in our faith as we did so. And as I have said before, we cannot wait until the day when we can share Aberle child number four with all of you. Just as each of you have shared our sorrow, the joy on that day is going to be multiplied.