On the way home Josiah and I discussed everything that had just happened. One common theme we've noticed is that each time we meet a mom, we have a deep desire to help. Haven's mom, Titus's mom, Sahira's mom, and Autumn's mom all have different hardships that are unique to their life and challenges specific to their situation. They all need love, prayers and support. We found this common denominator to be important for us. Often, adoptive parents talk about an obvious moment of clarity where they realize, "this IS the baby, I just KNOW it is the baby." And sometimes they are right. But Josiah and I don't think we will have this sort of feeling. Each time we have met with a birthmother, we have felt the her need as she explained her situation and detailed the challenges she faces. We decide to do whatever we can, knowing that the door will close if and when it needs to. In many ways, this takes the pressure off. We don't have to frantically try to figure out if we are talking to "the one"; instead we just try to be ourselves and let the will of God unfold. It has made me think about other areas of life as well. Maybe instead of helping others when I want to (or on my schedule) and how I see best (if it fits into what I perceive are my gifts), I should just be on the lookout for a need. And when I see one, I should help. There's no question about the fact that there are needs all around.
Overall, we are really happy with how it went. Thankfully, we only have a few weeks to go before we know the end of this part of this story. In the meantime, we are prepared to add another child to our home, and we pray that God will continue to affirm her choices and give her the confidence that she needs. Thank you for praying along with us and loving us so much.